To whom it may concern....

dont be stupid! who the hell WANTS an eating disorder??? I went through 3 months of day treatment at the hospital and i was there for the least amount of time i could. I am now fighting every day to live! dont be stupid, love ur body before its too late!


- me and KD are still together, over 7 months and we are going really good
- im out of treatment and trying my best to give myself a future!
- this blog is now 100% about recovery and if u ever want to say anything or ask anything have no fear! u will never be yelled at for ur thoughts!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

fast day two

ok so i didn't get to do a real fast but i did stick to a liquid fast of as low of calories as possible. my friend bought me coffee because i was tired and i couldn't say no because i had no real excuse i could think of. i went out tonight with some guy and his friends and they were drinking and i got away with only having a few sips and just saying i wasn't feeling good. nothign solid and that is all i wanted in the first place right?

i realized that i never really do explain my days, so here is the basic everyday outline:

- wake up at 7:30 if i have a class in the morning and 8:30 if i dont
- shower, get dressed, do hair, brush teeth, run around house looking for binder/homework, drink 1 tall glass of salt water and a tall glass of normal water so i can take all my pills, do make up, leave at either 8:50 or 9:10 (depending on first class or no) {yes i do all this EVERY day, in that EXACT order, i freak out if anyone is home and they try to ruin my order...}
- school till 12:20, diet coke for lunch
- either work from 1 till 5 or 6 OR go home and make a bunch of dishes then get as much homework done as possible
- when the rents get home i do the chores they wanted me to do before
- every night i have a certain show i watch at a certain time, each night is different
-then at 10pm i wash face, change and then brush teeth {weird order i knwo but i cant put on my pjs if my face isn't clean i dont know why...}

i am never willing to alter my plans for people but if i'm not doing anything and there is a chance to get out of my house and doing something, then for sure!

really in this moment all i want to do is explain everything about me, but i know that no one is really reading this so there is no point, maybe one day ill just do it to get it out there!
but not today...........

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